Couples who are about to separate and divorce are understandably faced with very difficult problems. In their simplest terms, these problems are: How are they each going to be able to be the important influence in their children’s lives in the future that they have been in the past? What is going to happen to the property that is in their joint and individual names, and if they are going to divide it, how are they going to do that? How will each of them be able to manage financially following their separation and divorce? What obligations, if any, should one of them have to the other (and to their children)?
That leaves them with a choice. They can retain separate lawyers and proceed to court as a means of resolving these problems. Or they can sit down and, with the right help, resolve their problems on their own. Through the adversarial court process the object will simply be for either party to win at any cost, and inevitably neither will concern themselves with where that will leave the other, let alone whether he or she will be able to manage at all. If the two parties attempt to sit down and address these problems sensibly and responsibly, the result will be very different as they will reach an agreement that they can both live with. This is particularly true if the separating parties have children. It is always children who get caught in the middle of the adversarial process, which unnecessarily calls into question their loyalties to one or both of their parents. At DSS we understand that children deserve to be sheltered from this and come first